If you have been listening to Fat Chicks on Top, you know I’ve been talking to a variety of kinky folks who entered the scene over 20 years ago. With each generation, including the one I came into in the early 1990s, practice of kink changes a bit. As each new generation emerges, the older folks (often referred to as ‘Old Guard’) bitch about some of the changes. This is a story as long as the community has existed. While everyone has a bit of a different take on “The New Gene

Communication is key. You have heard it hundreds, if not thousands of time when it comes to creating successful relationships and successful kink scene, “Communicate.” Great! But, what happppens if you are not a big talker? Or if you are shy? Or if you simply hate having long, deep discussions about feelings and needs? Communication for folks who don’t like long talks may seem difficult at first glance. However, there are lots of different forms of communication. See if any o

A formatted and printable version of this post is located here: 30 days of kinky self-discoveryDownload I’ll be honest. I have been half-ass writing this for a while but have lacked the discipline to really get it done. I was in a D/s discussion group where a number of folx mentioned that they had done similar exercises in the past with varying success. I figure since many of us have a bit more time at home with conferences going online, play spaces shut down, and travel not

Journaling is a common communication technique recommended in the kink community. However, most of us hate to write. I include myself in this group. Until my mid-30s I both hated to write and sucked at it. Seriously, a blank screen or page was torture. Having to come up with 500 words seemed like a daunting task. And I have dyslexia so writing was really painful. At munches and in reading about kink I would see the suggestion to journal and think, “Yeah, that is great if you