One Question Every Submissive Needs to Answer
When I am on my knees, looking up at my Dom, waiting on his command, I am in complete bliss. There is something wonderful and liberating...
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Love letters to a unicorn is a blog covering kink, power exchange, and sex from the perspective of a submissive or bottom. It provides sex toy reviews and a vetted list of resources as well.
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Rebecca Blanton
- Jul 16, 2021
- 7 min
How Do You Create an Aftercare Plan?
Aftercare is a frequently mentioned idea in kink/BDSM classes and touted as “important” for safe, sane, and consensual play. Most of the...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Oct 5, 2019
- 5 min
Pain and Presence
There are different theories on how people “should” deal with pain. Some folks argue for being present with the pain. Some argue for...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Jul 12, 2018
- 5 min
Sexual Healing (part 2)
When I was in one of my basic psychology courses in undergrad, the professor described sublimation with the following example. Say you...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Jun 27, 2018
- 5 min
Sexual Healing (part 1)
The theme of healing through kink has come up repeatedly in both my reading and real life a lot lately. For me, this is a touchy subject....
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Rebecca Blanton
- Jun 6, 2018
- 3 min
Want to Feel More Beautiful? Try This!
Most of us, whatever our gender, whatever our sexual orientation, do not love our bodies. Or, we do not love our bodies most of the time....
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Rebecca Blanton
- May 8, 2017
- 3 min
Agender – What does that mean?
I find being agender weird. Most days, really about 98 percent of the time, I could care less about my gender. I am a feminist for...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Mar 8, 2017
- 3 min
In Praise of “Just a Phase”
We are living in an age where certainty is demanded. Any time someone changes their mind or expresses any level of uncertainty, people...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Dec 29, 2016
- 5 min
What 2016 Can Teach You About Relationships
By most accounts, unless you are a rape-y cheeto with narcissistic personality disorder, this was a shit year. People are hoping 2017...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Sep 12, 2016
- 4 min
On Certainty
At some point in the last decade culture in the United States started demanding that people be certain about everything. We collectively...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Aug 17, 2016
- 5 min
Do It For the Children! Media Representation
What is portrayed in the popular media makes a big difference. Not a profound statement, but most people- even those who agree- often...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Aug 2, 2016
- 5 min
D-types and Mental Illness
After teaching my class “Power Exchange and Mental Illness” several times and corresponding with folks online who have read my writing...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Apr 25, 2016
- 3 min
Am I Doing this Right????
Its the most common question I see of new kinksters, “Am I doing this right?” It comes in several versions, “I think I am a Domme, but I...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Apr 3, 2016
- 5 min
On Virtue and Vice
8? 25? 105? 300? 1,023? Is there such a thing as having too many sexual partners? Are you a sex addict? Is sex your vice? Is sex a...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Feb 18, 2016
- 6 min
In Sickness and In Health…
I have been away from this blog for a couple of weeks due to illness. For two and a half years I have been trying to get some chronic...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Dec 10, 2015
- 5 min
Is Sex Always Part of BDSM?
I have had a bunch of conversations lately about incorporating sex into BDSM play. Some people have to have both in a session, others do...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Oct 29, 2015
- 7 min
The ‘Woo’ of Kink
My last post about sub space got a flood of responses. Most of the 3,000+ people who replied here and on Fetlife were very complimentary....
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Rebecca Blanton
- Oct 22, 2015
- 6 min
Born This Way?
There is a local comedian in Sacramento who does a great joke. She starts with the premise that her parents used to spank her. Now, she...
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Rebecca Blanton
- Sep 8, 2015
- 6 min
To Be “Real”
You Got To Be Real – Cheryl Lynn (1978) There are few things in English I hate more than the insistence of modifying a social construct...
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