You are probably familiar with mantras. They are short statements or words said repeatedly to help focus you. They are rooted in Buddhism and Hinduism. However, many people have adopted them to fit the need to stay focused or connect with oneself. If you have participated in some meditation classes, you probably experienced saying a single word or sound repeatedly to help focus your mind. The classic “Om” chanted during mediation is a mantra. Why would these mantras be import

I adore having protocols in a relationship. Those rules and rituals power exchange couples create to serve their relationship provide a sense of belonging and security to me as a submissive. Protocols have a wide variety. Some are routine (e.g., daily or weekly tasks), some are situational (e.g., opening the door for a dominant), and some are sexual (e.g., having a butt plug inserted before your D-type arrives for play). When kink classes teach about protocols it is almost un

Living with anxiety is a bitch. We all experience anxiety at some point in our lives. However, lots of folks live with anxiety as part of a clinical disorder or health condition. In the U.S., 18 percent of adults (over 40 million of us) live with clinical anxiety. This persistent and excessive worrying is difficult on the person with anxiety as well as on the people who love them. Anxiety can interfere with relationships and with a person’s sex life. Worrying about how you lo

After teaching my class “Power Exchange and Mental Illness” several times and corresponding with folks online who have read my writing about mental illness and BDSM, I have noticed most people assume that it is the submissive/slave/bottom who would be mentally ill. Statistically, this is incorrect. People on all parts of the BDSM spectrum experience mental illness. While this blog is dedicated to the submissive side of the lifestyle, I want to address the issues of D-types wi