“Submission is a gift.” I hear that phrase constantly in the kink community. I hear submissives say it. I hear Dom(me)s say it. Switches say it. I have said it. Pretty much everyone I hear speak about submission at some point utters this phrase. It seems almost like assumed knowledge in the kink world. But is submission really a gift? I want to unpack the idea of submission as a gift in this blog. Yes, It Can Be Okay, I do see some parts of submission as a gift. When you ente

Okay, yes, I have done a lot of things. And yes, I have done a lot of people. And sure, I talk about some of it. But, no I haven’t done everything. Its funny to me that people are either amazed, intimidated or put off when it comes to finding out about my level of experience. Sure, I am use to vanilla folks saying, “DAMN girl!!! I can’t believe you did that!” But I have also heard it from kinky folks. I had the honor of doing a demo Armory earlier this year. Over dinner, the

If you practice consensual non-monogamy, can you cheat? The short answer is, “Yes.” I practice ethical non-monogamy. My friends who are monogamous often assume this means I can sleep with anyone I want, at any time, and my partners with just accept it. This is far from the case. Ethical non-monogamy stresses the ETHICAL part. If you just sleep around, that is just non-monogamy. Ethical non-monogamy stresses practicing non-monogamy within boundaries. Ethical non-monogamy and p