I did an interview for Unleash Their PoTEENtial a free, online teen summit about the future of gender (spoiler alert: its nonbinary). Looking for information about what nonbinary means, how it impacts teens, and what you can do to support your teen if they come out as nonbinary? Check out the free talk at” https://unleashtheirpoteential.com/RebeccaB Share this: Tweet Email Print #parenting #trans #comingout #teens #transgender #nonbinary #LGBTQ

The more I read about nonbinary folks and the more I see cis folks try and talk about nonbinary folks, the more I understand that this is just a giant ball of confusion for many people. As someone who has understood gender isn’t binary and has been living as a nonbinary person for way longer than it has been in the mass media, it always surprises me how much so many folks struggle with the concept. So dear reader, here are a few things I think might help clear up some issues.

There is a new call to add a K for “kink” to the LGBTQ+ acronym. This call for more inclusion has highlighted a couple of issues in both the queer and kink communities. To be clear, I am against adding kink to the LGBTQ acronym and by extension, the groups which work on behalf of us queers for political rights. Failure to Know Our History The call is promoted by folks who believe the LGBTQ+ community should be inclusive of all groups with any form of alternative sexuality or

News headlines are floating around about 20 percent of Millennials identifying as “non-binary.” This is based on a new study by GLAAD working with Harris Poll which looks at acceptance of sexual and gender identities. The initial headlines caught my attention because most news outlets framed this as “20 percent of Millennials identify as non-binary.” This is actually a huge number when you start to think about it. Even lumping together the different non-binary identities (e.g

I pass as a heterosexual cis-female and I hate that. I have always passed (well, more or less) regardless of what I wear, my hair, binders, softees, make-up on and off… I pass. Sure, there have been periods of time when I have worked really hard to not pass and yes, I get mistaken for a man a lot. But by and large people see me and think I’m just another heterosexual cis-female. The older I get, the more I pass. I put on weight in my 30s and strapping down DDs is a lot tricki

The other night I was at a poetry open mic billed as a “safe space” for the LGBTQAII community. As per the norm in such spaces, the host was asking each person who signed up what their preferred pronouns were. This has become common practice in a lot of queer and sex positive spaces. I gave her my honest answer, “I don’t care.” My partner was in line behind me to sign up. The host asked him the same question. He replied “male” but after walking away, said he was very offended

Guest Author: Joie de Vivre Joie de Vivre is a the co-producer of Peepshow in San Francisco and a burlesque performer. She regularly performs with the Hubba Hubba review and other troupes. I have been a huge admirer of hers for some time. She graciously agreed to be a guest blogger about being beautiful ugly. You can find Joie at on Facebook. Not everyone gets to be beautiful, and I’m one of them. That isn’t self-hatred, it’s statistics — a few of us are beautiful, a few of u

I find being agender weird. Most days, really about 98 percent of the time, I could care less about my gender. I am a feminist for political reasons and not because I am deeply attached to some notion of my “womanhood.” But there are moments, those days when my body is in conflict with everything I feel I am and the dysphoria is horrible. Now, I have never “liked” my body. I generally see it as an asshole I have to live with (literally and figuratively, of course). It has a h

I debated a lot before I decided to post this blog entry. I have been active in the LGBTQ movement for thirty years now. I know the damage that anti-gay attitudes do to people are not heterosexual. Gay kids and trans kids still kill themselves at alarming rates. Queer folks are the target of an incredible about of violence and discrimination. And despite meeting the equality goal of being able to legally marry (a very middle class goal), we still have miles to go before queer

Recently I have seen a lot of memes and other social media that is similar to the above posting. They all have examples of parents explaining transgendered folks to children in a somewhat healthy way. Most of the examples are pretty congratulatory about explaining someone who appears to be one gender dressed as another gender as “in the wrong body” and “needs to fix that.” I understand that the dominant narrative about trans folks is that anyone identified as “trans” is in th

To the Students of Oak Park HS in Kansas City, MO and their parents: Thank you. Thank you all for standing up for your classmate. I watched the video of the group of students in Kansas City, MO chase off the hate-based Westboro Baptist Church protesters tonight. The students have nominated a trans girl to be a prom queen. The hate group showed up with their signs to protest the support and acceptance shown by the students at the high school. A group of students simply walked

I have written here about being agendered. I am working on an extended piece for my next book. In doing that, I have been speaking with others to help develop the ideas around the concept of agendered. One question several trans friends have asked is about body dismorphia. For many trans folks, they express the feeling that they were “born in the wrong body.” They undergo various treatments and procedures to try and make their external bodies match with how they feel they sho