Navtivity of dicks thanks to a grab bag of tiny dicks from http://www.funkittoys.com
Dear Readers:
Welcome to the holiday madness! I am sending this out a fewdays early this month because a lot of great small businesses are counting on holidayshopping to stay afloat this year. I’ve listed some of my favorites below. If youare planning on buying books or sex stuff, please DO NOT SHOP AMAZON! The behemoth does not need your money to survive. Shopping small businesses keep people employed, cash flowing into local economies, and support folks who don’t censorour lives.
November has been a tough month for your Auntie. I lost mykitty (Mia) who I love and who will be in the upcoming documentary Cat People. I’m glad she isn’t in pain, but it was tough to lose her. I alsohave been sick (autoimmune stuff) which has slowed down work and made communication and event work difficult! So sorry to the folks who showed up to Dyke Night on Nov. 20th. With an overwhelmed brain, I got the date wrong. It will be November 27th from 6-8 PM.
I got to teach at Kink School out of Canada last week. It was a wonderful experience. I taught three classes, and all have great participation from folks who attended. The conference also featured several great teachers covering a huge variety of topics. If you missed it, mark your calendarfor November 2025.
Even though I anticipated the election results, it was still deeply upsetting how fucked up American voting patterns turned out to be. Really, America? That much of a turn to the hard right?? FFS. Here in Nevada County, the queer community has mobilized to fight hate and bad policy in our county.Our first “All hands on deck” meeting was the Sunday post-election. Our nextone is December 8th (information in the events section).
I also did some writing on substack about surviving the next four years (and beyond). I started withthis post and followed it up with the importance of not shrinking from the challenge. After listening to interviews and reading stuff from supporters of the conservative movement, I realized that so many folks believe that the proposed policies (mass deportation, gender affirmationcare bans, bans on gay adoption) will only affect “bad people” which translates to “not the people I know.” When confronted with the fact that these policies would hurt someone they care about or support, they have a hard time fathoming itwould hit close to home.
Side Note: The first research team I was on was in Greg Herek’s lab at UC Davis. One of his big findings was that when someone knew three or more people of a marginalized group, they became supportive of that group’s rights. His study focused on HIV/AIDS, but the findings are applicable to many groups. Just three people of a group and someone moves from biased against the group to supportive. This is why its so critical to be out about who you are!
This gives us a chance to make a difference without actuallygetting involved with the legislative process. This is where your story becomesimportant. If people who care about you or support you know that proposedpolicy changes will hurt you directly, it lessens their support of the policyand the politician supporting them. As you have a chance to spend time withfamily and friends over the holiday season, let them know you. When Aunt Karen bringsup how happy they are with the outcome of the election, it’s a great time tolet her know that the proposed policies for healthcare changes would strip youof access to care. If Uncle Lou is fawning over tRump, pointing out that theproposed tariffs, when the cost is passed on to you, will make it impossible tobuy a new car to replace your 25-year-old clunker. The more others who careabout you know how their decisions hurt you personally, the less likely theyare to support the policy change.
I know this isn’t always easy. Being rejected by people youcare about can hurt- a lot. However, their votes this month will also hurt you-a lot. The new administration isn’t in office yet. Their policies are justideas (or concepts of an idea). We still have time to mobilize and get folks tosee the detriments of the ideas supported by incoming politicians.
Updates on Fat Chicks
I’m releasing a new episode next week. After that, the show will be on hiatus until mid-January. I will be doing a pod swap with Lost Spaces , a British podcast in December. You will be able to hear one of thier episodes in mid-December on the Fat Chicks stream.
Guest updates…
Luka and Leja (owners of The Sex Shed) have launched a kickstarter for a new sexy game. Check it out!
Rachel Kramer Bussel is launching a podcast! Her other ventures have been awesome, so keep an eye out for it.
Nika Cherrelle is hosting weekly group meetings via Zoom for folks looking to work through sexual shame. Find the listing here.
What I’m Reading, Watching, and Listening Too
I dove into Interior, Chinatown (Hulu). Its brilliant! Beautifully shot and written. Ronny Chieng is amazing as the angry waiter. Jimmy O. Yang has captured the character with nuance. It’s an absolute joy to watch.
I’ve been streaming the new John Batiste album “Beethovan Blues” and it is wonderful. Nuanced phrasing, creating combination of genres, and pushing is composition forward. I also can’t decide if I love or hate the new love song to a Subaru Impreza.
I’ve added a few substack newsletters to my feed. Feminist Giant has provided bite-size posts to keep me pumped to overthrow the patriarchy. I’ve been reading Ijeoma Oula for a white, but lately she has been on fire! I also just ordered her book Be A Revolution and really looking forward to reading it.
Stay Kinky,
Auntie Vice
UPCOMING EVENTS
November 27th Dyke Night
6-8 PM at The Cauldron @ Loot & Lore (107 W. Main Street, Suite C, Grass Valley, CA)
December 8th LGBTQ+ Community Meeting
3-5 PM at Madeline Helling Library Meeting Room (980 Helling Way, Nevada City, CA)
December 24 Queer Wellness Ritual
6:30-8:30 PM at The Cauldron @ Loot & Lore (107 W. Main Street, Grass Valley, CA)
January 29 Dyke Night 6-8 PM at the Cauldron @ Loot & Lore (107 W. Main Street, Suite C, Grass Valley, CA)
Discount Codes, Specials, & Great Small Businesses
Betty’s Toy BoxCode: Auntie (10% off)
Black Friday Deals include: 25% off Blush Products, Free Shipping on order $75+
Blue Stockings (books)
RedEmmas.org(books)
The Sex Shed Code: Auntie (10% off)
Journal Prompts & Kinky Ideas!
Prompts
What makes it difficult for you to feel gratitude?
How do you like to communicate about difficult issues? Have you let people important to you know about things that help you better communicate under stress?
What rituals do you have around the winter holidays? Which ones do you like?
Do you feel you have the right to ask for support getting through difficult times? Where does this belief come from?
What brings you joy this time of years?
Fun Holiday Ideas!
Use your gift wrapping supplies to decorate yourself or a partner, tie them up, or unwrap them as a gift!
Ever get curious about feet? I’ve got a toe-sucking article for you!
You can also read more from me about safer hair pulling!
Splurge and buy yourself a sexy holiday present. It might be a sex toy you always wanted, a pair of latex panties, or a great rope!
Traveling in the next month or two? Pick up a great toy box to pack your stuff in. I suggest this one.
Desparately Seeking Dopamine
When being a trans ex lesbian is cool with dad, but then you go a step too far…
Culinary experts realize “No Nut November” isn’t an allergy
The Onion buys InfoWars in the best business news of the year
Scientists find a real life AquaMan
Bring your kid to work day goes horribly wrong