It is Pride month. This year is particularly politically charged. There are fights about adding black and brown stripes to the Pride...

Kink, in many forms, is now more popular and more visible than ever. I knew we had gone mainstream when American Dad, Family Guy and...

We are living in an age where certainty is demanded. Any time someone changes their mind or expresses any level of uncertainty, people...

Let’s talk about the idea of “religious freedom” and why it is absolutely imperative for all of us to be as queer and kinky as possible....

I have written before in this blog about living with and engaging in power exchange relationships while living with a mental illness. I...

Immediacy is valued by many. We want what we want and we want it now! The whole concept of delayed gratification has become nearly...

Tips for identifying abuse with the BDSM community and power exchange relationship

Since Thanksgiving is this week in the United States, I am going to step out of the series of posts on community building and give thanks...

The recent election of the racist cheeto has many folks in the kink community reeling. We are hurt and horrified by the hate harbored in...

Since America is voting today and will either get the first female president or its first/last dictator supreme, I figured I would post...

One of the core principles of BDSM play is that players, all players, have a right to protect their body and mind. We stress consent,...

I know that seems counter-intuitive to most people. Isn’t the role of an s-type based on giving power, sometimes total power, to a...

I love the BDSM community. I love kink. It is integral to who I am and how I see the world. I love the aesthetic, the values, and the...

One of the best things about the kink community is that it places consent front and center of community values. Not only do groups talk...

At some point in the last decade culture in the United States started demanding that people be certain about everything. We collectively...

Talking about “triggers” and starting posts and group discussions with “trigger warnings” is now de riguer in the kink community. It has...

What is portrayed in the popular media makes a big difference. Not a profound statement,  but most people- even those who agree- often...

Service is quintessential to much of submission. Submissives of many ilks incorporate some form of service into their submission. We...

Consent is one of these topics that comes up all the time in the kink community. It will come up in the wider world after a horrific rape...

I have had to come out about things a few times in my life. I’m queer. I’m bipolar. I am kinky. None of these things are obvious at first...